Good grief. Drink it in. Cometh the hour, cometh the Captain Marvel and there’s not a dry eye in the house. Simply the best, out of nowhere; it was all or nothing. No matter how many clichés you throw at it, you’ll never do it any justice. Take a bow, Vincent Thumpany, you’ve just reached another echelon of immortality.
Commiserations to the poor bloke that walked out into the concourse for one of the most anxious pisses of his life right at the moment big Vinny thhhhh-wacked it just about as into the top corner as a ball can be. Further commiserations to Liverpool fans, we couldn’t quite hear your sobs over the chaos of it all.
What a goal. That nano-thought of ‘shoot’ flashed through his massive head only for him to change his mind. Then, everybody told him not to shoot; and like touching a hot plate that a waiter told him not to touch because it’s hot… he just went and did it.
Guardiola said it was an incredible game. It wasn’t… not in the good way anyway. It was a nervous, highly-strung performance by City. In the excitement of it all they seemed to have forgotten their shooting boots and could only manage a couple of decent efforts on goal. I always assumed Kasper Schmeichel was a decent guy, a tolerable ex-player. Last night he got right on my tits.
The crowd didn’t help either. They started off loud, but it wasn’t long before things got a little bit edgy. It’s not our fault, we need an innate cynicism to support this club. It’s part of the heritage, passed down through generations of anxious fans. By the end it was absolutely rocking.
It all changed when the big man with the big head stepped up. Relief, calm… rapture. If you didn’t whimper at the scenes of this great man, hiding his tears from the camera after what could be his last game at the Etihad… then you’re probably not a city fan. Nor if your heart didn’t flutter when you heard Sergio Agüero telling his captain and friend of 8 years “I say no Vinny, don’t shoot, no. No!” in perfectly broken English. Nor if you didn’t wake up this morning, open your Twitter app, and watch that goal over and over and over again.
These are the moments that we will remember forever; this is our history.
With a special shoutout for Kelechi Iheanacho- we’re nearly there. We’ve got to beat Brighton which will be just as nervy as the Leicester match and we could even lose it. But I don’t even care anymore. This season has been an unbelievable experience, I got to watch Vincent Kompany play in his heyday, and I felt the feeling of that goal.
So the biggest shoutout goes to you, Vincent Kompany. You’ve lived and breathed the last 11 years alongside us. If you stay with us next season or not, whatever- you’ve done it now. You’re part of our lives; part of our growing up. You’re a hero. Kids, cats, dogs, stands, roads, and anything else will be named after you.
They’re even going to build a statue with your big, beautiful shiny head.
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